4 Months!

Ahh yes, so I said I wouldnt post pics of Max on my blog. But hes simply adorably, so I had to :)

Current weight: 15 lbs 9 oz

Length: 26 1/2 inches

Likes: Max loves to look at himself in the mirror. I think of all the people he looks at, he gets most excited at his own reflection. If I ever want to get a huge smile out of the little guy, I always put him in from of the mirror. He also really enjoys baths. He splashes and splashes and giggles and coos every bath, its simply adorable! Max also enjoys having his clothes off. I think this is partly why he loves baths so much, too. Every time I go to change him get get a huge grin because he gets to be partly naked, and when the clothes go back on he tends to fuss a little. He also really loves it when I lay on my back, bring my knees to my chest, and lay him on my shins. This gives me a great ab workout as well! Lastly, I think more than anything, Max loves to watch any kind of action. He has to be sitting up at all times looking around at whats going on. "Hes very alert" is a phrase uttered by 95% of the people that hold him.

Dislikes: Being hungry. Max really only fusses when hes hungry- the boy likes to eat!!

Sleeping habits: Bedtime tends to fall between 8:30-9. He wakes up around 4:30, then hes back to sleep anywhere from 5:30-7. He naps around 8, 11, and 3 every day as well. He unfortunately gotten into the bad habit of nursing himself to sleep for naps and bedtime....a habit that I hope to be broke soon. Eating: Still mommy's milk! Soon I am going to introduce him to cereal. I just want to talk it over with the pediatrician at next week's appointment.

What he has learned: To roll over! At 16 weeks he rolled from tummy to back. Hes very close to rolling over from back to tummy, but his arm gets stuck in the way. He has also learned to grab many things. He also began laughing this month, which is such a cool thing to hear!

What I have learned: I have learned that nursing really does help you lose weight! I am now 5 pounds under my pre-baby weight, which actually was my goal weight. I hope and plan to lost 5 more now, its just soooo nice to have a wardrobe back again!

Life with Max in it is simply amazing. I think its so awesome to watch him grow, be his mom, and show him love. He is such a precious little guy and I just adore him. He has exceeded all expectations of what life would be like with a child in it (now if only he could fulfill my dreams for him to play in the nba someday, lol). I'm not sure if it was the massive amounts of prayers said for him during my pregnancy, but I really feel so lucky to have such a wonderful and completely adorable baby :)

3 months!

Current weight: 13 lbs 12 oz

Length: 24 inches

Likes: "Dancing" Max really enjoys laying under his play mat, listening to the music play and kicking his arms and legs along with the beat. He also kind of bobs his body when rap music comes on...he gets that from him momma! Hes also a big fan of his bouncer (most of the time and in small doses). Hes got to have it on vibrate and he loves kicking the toys that dangle so he can hear the music...these songs now get stuck in my head when Im trying to fall asleep at night.

Dislikes: When his daddy talks really loud. Max barely fusses, but twice last month Jeremy was telling a story while holding Max, at one point in the story he was doing an impression and yelled a little. Max hated it, screamed and it took me a few minutes to calm him down.

Sleeping habits: I cant say enough about how amazing it is to have a routine! Max goes to bed at nine, wakes up at 2:30, and then again around 6. Hes usually up for good around 8, unless im subbing, then its 6. He naps at 9:30 and around 3, and also takes a short nap around 7. I did get really sick one night and the rest of the week he was the most horrific sleeper ever- he would wake up about every hour and not take any naps during the day, it was terrible, especially since I was trying to get better. Thankfully that didnt last.

Eating: Still breast milk. I have never been a huge advocate for breast feeding, because I wasnt sure I would be able to do it, and I think the formula that is made today is very good. My original reasons for deciding to breastfeed were that it was free, and I wanted to lose weight faster. (I have since determined that due to the massive amount that breastfed babies poop, the money you save all goes toward diapers.) This last month, however, has shown me that I made a terrific decision when deciding to nurse Max and heres why: When I got sick it was awful. I was up all night with diarrhea and vomiting. FOUR days after I was sick I felt great and decided to meet a friend for lunch, hang out with my sis, and attend my book club. I came in to contact with 10 people that day, and within two days, 8 of them had caught it. It spread like wildfire through their families and through daycare. BUT you know who didnt get it? Max! My three month old baby who has barely begun to develop an immune system did not catch it. This is all due to my milk. When I was sick my body was developing antibodies to fight the virus, these antibodies transferred through into my milk, but the virus did not, giving Max a strong advantage in fighting that crappy, super contagious illness. I also love the fact that I barely have to deal with bottles! And the bonding experience has been nothing but phenomenal.

What he has learned: Max's coordination has gotten much better in the last month. Hes very good at swatting at toys now. Hes also learned to put himself to sleep, and is getting much better at getting himself back to sleep when he makes up in the night. And just now (yeah I had to scroll up to add this) he discovered his feet!

What I have learned: Routine is critical! It has made my life so much easier when I began implementing a routine with Max. I have also learned that its impossible to please everyone with how you raise your child. Rarely does someone tell you your doing a great job, but so many (especially those mothers of multiple children) are very quick to judge that you are "too" attentive with your baby, or that you "spoil" them....and if you decide to back off someone is always there to tell you that your not doing enough. But thankfully I have a super easy baby, that rarely cries and is so full of love and smiles, that I feel as though I must be doing something right.

On a different note, next week will be Brody's two year angelversary. I can believe its been two years. Not a day has gone by that I haven't thought about him, missed him, or talked to him. Processing my emotions this year is very hard because I miss Brody so much and wish he was here, but I also know that Max would never be here if Brody was here. I have never imagined them growing up together, so in that aspect, I am not sad. Max hears about Brody all the time, and in sometimes I think Brody visits Max. So in some ways, Max and Brody will have a stronger bond than they ever would have. I know thats an kind of an odd way of thinking about it, but it is what it is. I will probably post again more about this on the 12th.

Two Months Old!

I decided to wait a day to update since Max went to the pediatrician today. I wanted to get accurate measurements of him. He got his two month vaccinations, which involved some crying- but it wasn't any worse that what I expected!

Current weight: 12 pounds 6 ounces

Length: 23 1/4 inches

Likes: Sitting up (with help of course). Max loves being sat up on someones knee so he can watch everything. He also likes to stand up and grunt and watch who is holding him. Sandy. This is Max's babysitter. She loves him so much, and you can tell he knows it! Staring at ceiling fans. It doesn't matter if they are on or off- hes not picky! His "paci." After eating, this is the one thing that really helps Max settle down. He has to have the soothie brand, no others will work (he also likes when someone sticks their finger in the end of it, which is something his cousin Riley just loves to do).

Dislikes: His medicine for thrush. About 10 days ago I took Max in to the doctor because his tongue was so white. While she wasn't convinced 100% it was thrush, she prescribed him some medicine to take care of it. Max hates getting this squirted into his mouth, and he usually gags on it and cries. Other than the medicine, there is nothing I have noticed that sets him off.

Sleeping habits: He is going to bed around 10:30, waking up once or twice in the night, and getting up for the day around 6. Usually by 8:30am we are ready for our first nap! lol

Eating: Max is still strictly on breast milk. Since I am back to subbing part time, I have to pump and he is given a bottle. I feel bad for Sandy, though, because Max isn't too good at drinking from a bottle. They all seem too fast for him. I have tried Medela, Avent, and Playtex bottle all "wide mouth, slow flow" nipples and they all seem too fast for him. If you have any suggestions, I would love to hear them!

What Max has learned: To hold his head up. Hes getting really good at this, but still bobbles. He loves to work on it, though! He also has started cooing last week and laughing a little bit. His social smile is definitely developed, he busts out his huge jester grin when just after a long nap (and many other times throughout the day). Just last week he found that sucking his thumb can help soothe him as well, but has only done this twice (that I know of).

What I have leaned: That avoiding eye contact after a certain time every night does wonders for getting a baby to fall asleep, this also works through the night as well. Eye contact really stimulates a baby, so this is one way to help calm them down at night. Also I learned today that Max should be taking more naps and that I need to establish a better routine for the little guy- so that is what I will be working on this coming month.

One month old!

One month in, and I couldn't be happier. Right now I am listening to Max in his swing, humming along and making the cutest noises anyone could ever hear. Here are a few stats about our little blessing:
Current weight: 10 pounds 12 ounces
Likes: Max seems to really love tummy time. We do it every morning when he is the most active and he tries so hard. He likes lifting his head and kicking up his legs in attempt to turn over.
Dislikes: Max doesnt seem to like laying flat on his back. He can crash out in pretty much every position, except if I put him flat on his back. He flails his arms and legs and grunts a whole lot as soon as hes put down.
Sleeping habits: Up until the past few days, Max fell asleep around 11 pm, woke around 3, 5,7, and up for good around 9 am. Then he would fall back asleep around 1pm until 7pm and back asleep at 11pm again. But the last two days hes been thrown off and has only gotten up twice in the night, but one of those times hes up for about 2.5 hours which is not fun! But I always nap once a day, so the lack of sleep hasn't really fazed me. Max is also a really loud sleeper, he grunts a lot throughout the night!
Eating: Max is still nursing and its going really great. Next week we are going to introduce a bottle of my milk to him for when I start back up at work. I plan to nurse as long as possible, six months is essentially my main goal.

All-in-all our first month was amazing and flew by. I love this child more and more every day, and little by little his personality peeks its way out. Life is lovely!

Birth Story/ First days

I know our birth story was scheduled and well thought out, as opposed to the usual waking-up-in-the-middle-of-the-night/water-breaking/contractions-and-pushing stories that most can share, ours was still precious :) I woke up that morning, got showered, dressed, and walked the dogs and we headed out the door around 7 am. Once we finally got to the hospital, I got changed, my IV was started, blood was drawn, and my vitals were taken. I was completely relaxed, and STILL at this point I couldn't get it in my head that I was about to have a baby. The anesthesiologist came in and talked to me about what they were going to do, and at that point I was just extremely nervous. I was more concentrated on going in to surgery than having a baby and I was pretty shaky. Then they wheeled in the girl that was scheduled right before me, I saw her first, and then the dad wheeling in the baby on the cart. This was the first it REALLY hit me that I was about to meet my son, and I totally lost it. I could not stop crying, I was so happy. During this time, a student nurse was walking over to introduce herself, saw me crying and felt so bad because she thought I was scared. It was nice to tell her I was just so happy :)
Next they wheeled me in to my operating room so I could get my spinal, and get fully prepped for surgery. Part way in Jeremy was able to join me which was such a relief. All of the sudden my doctor says "dad you can stand up if you would like to watch your son being born." It was amazing to watch Jeremy watch our son being born, and as I heard his first cry I completely lost it. Just the sound of his cry alone made me the happiest person in the world, I was so overwhelmed with joy to get him here I couldn't keep the tears in. It felt like an eternity before I could see him. I heard them say he was 7 pounds 8 ounces and was 20 inches long. Then Jeremy brought him over and layed him on my chest and the tears flowed and I realized just how lucky I am to be this little boys mom.
Since birth, Max has been nothing short of amazing. In his first 12 hours he pooped 7 times- which is a sign on a very healthy baby. Usually they hope that a child poops once in 24 hours. He immediately picked up on breastfeeding, and he was able to escape getting jaundice like almost every baby gets. He only gets up twice during the night, usually around 1 and again around 5:30. I am sleeping better now than when I was pregnant! He rarely cries, but almost always does when hes being changed. Hes not a fan of being swaddled, hes very strong and can usually kick his blanket off in his sleep. When awake he loves to look around and almost always follows the sound of his mommy and daddy's voices. Hes simply perfect :)
I am recovering MUCH better than my last csection. I was able to get up and out of bed within 12 hours of surgery and was walking in the halls the next day. My only setback was when we got home I fell asleep on the couch and my 16 pound yorkie climbed on the back of the couch and leaped right on to my belly. It was definitely horrendous pain, but by that night Jeremy and I were able to take Max and the dogs for a lap around the park.
Life now just feels so complete. Everything we went through, and every bit of pain was worth it to get this little boy here safe. I know that Brody is watching over him, we still feel him so close. In moments, my entire life has changed, I have never known such a feeling of happiness in my entire life.

Last Post Before Max Arrives!

In less than two days I will be holding my baby boy, and I have never been more excited, happy, and nervous in my entire life. Even with a big, protruding belly, it almost seems unrealistic to me that Max will be here so soon. It feels like we have waited SO long to bring home our baby, we are very blessed to get to this point with no complications. I am proud to say I never developed preeclampsia and Max made it through July when many people thought he wouldn't. Looking back on previous posts, I can see how far we have come, what we have been through, and what we have done just to get Max here safe. I am very scared, though. I really don't have a clue as to what to do when Max actually gets here, but I do know that a baby needs love, and I know I will be AMAZING at giving that to him :).

As far as visiting us in the hospital/home:
I will be delivering Max around 10 am on Thursday, and we ask that only immediate family come up to the hospital that day. Friday and Saturday all are welcome to all as long as you are feeling 100% well and aren't coming at the crack of dawn ;). We really do want to show him off and want people to hold him and love on him, we just want to make sure hes not overwhelmed or exposed to sickness as well. We should be home on Sunday and people are welcome to come to the house as well- just please let us know when you are planning on coming over, AND if you feel like bringing a meal we wouldnt stop you ;) lol.

Updates/pictures:
I will probably be sending out a text on Thursday sometime with birth time, weight, and length and possibly a pic. If I dont have your number, and you want a text, send it to me on facebook or email it to me at abbymouch@gmail.com.
I also will NOT be putting any pictures up on this blog of Max, but I will be putting them up on facebook. I have various reasons for this, but if you are not on facebook and want to check him out, I will email some to you. Thanks for understanding!

Thank you so much to all those that have been a positive support system to Max and I throughout this entire pregnancy. We are finally here (in 40 hours)- how amazing!!

My last Doctor's Appointment and NST

After a little "scare" (and by scare I mean excitement that I might be going into labor) I am still here with Max in my tummy. Yesterday around three I started having contractions, which is something that has been pretty normal for the past month or so. This time seemed different, though, because they started out rather painful- so I decided to start timing them right away. They started out every fifteen minutes and after about 4 hours went to every ten minutes. From there they plateaued and didnt get any stronger or closer together so we waited it out at home until they eventually went away. It was very frustrating because no real progress was made. We were excited at first, and toward the end I was just annoyed because I wanted them to either get better or worse. BUT nothing happened and so we were able to make it to my appointment today.

Today was a rather boring day of appointments, which made me feel kind of bad for Jeremy since this was his first time to meet my doctor. We had to wait about 30 mins to get into my NST, which I think might have made Max a little upset because he refused to move again. We tried ice water, wiggling, and poking, but the only thing to get him to move was the little buzzer. I did have a real nice sized contraction during the process...they seem to creep up every now and then.

Then we met with the doctor to get everything squared away for the csection. We really didnt learn anything new here, just that I am not to eat or drink anything after midnight the night before. I also found out that I will be getting staples again, which I was told at St. V's after I had Brody that most doctors to the glue stuff (I had staples with Brody, too, because of something with my tissue and being on bedrest so long). We are to get to the hospital at 8am, and Max will be delivered around 10 am August 5. We are SO excited and ready to meet this little guy in 9 days! Expect one more blog before I deliver next Thursday with all the details of visitation and whatnot :) If anything happens before then, I will definitely keep people updated through texts and phone calls.

36 weeks- 13 days left :)

With just under two weeks to go in my pregnancy, I went in for my second-to-last ob appointment and NST. Up to this point I have asked many questions- trying to keep up on my weight, blood pressure and whatnot...today I sat back and just enjoyed being there. My NST went really well- Max had NO trouble showing that he was perfectly able to move this time. Maybe the little buzzer scared him last time because he did not stop moving from the second I got in there. I had no contractions or any cramping, all went really well. I was able to have a really good talk with the nurse while I was in there being monitored, we eventually landed on the subject of blood clotting disorders and their link with so many miscarriages. One thing I learned is that my doctor doesnt check just anyone for MTHFR, just people with reoccurring miscarriages or losses. I also learned that up until about 6 years ago, they had no idea there was a correlation between blood clotting disorders and miscarriage. I am SO happy I was tested for this and I never had to go through another loss to figure out I had it. I am also very fortunate to live in these times, if I was older I might have never thought I could carry a baby.

My appointment with my ob was quick and easy. I found out that I will NOT be getting cervix checks at all- apparently there is no point to check me when we know I'm having a c-section. I know they aren't a walk in the park, so this made me rather happy. I am starting to realize there are some advantages to having a c-section I guess! We are just meeting once more next Tuesday to go over everything in complete detail. Hopefully Jeremy will be able to make it to this appointment and be able to meet my doctor.

Since it is a bit of a drive to get to Toledo, I like to save all my errands for one trip. Unfortunately, today was 98 degrees outside with a heat index of over 100! Thankfully people can be extremely sympathetic to a 9 month pregnant woman on days like today. One of my trips was to babies r us to get a baby book for Max. I have really enjoyed looking back at mine over the years and want to keep up on one for him (not like a boy is going to be that interested- but its good to have!) I opened it and started looking through the pages and immediately started crying in the store. I think it REALLY hit me then how close this is and just how much I am ready to love, nurture, and care for this baby. Yes I complain, feel huge, uncomfortable, and ready to be done- but that does NOT mean in any way that I don't appreciate this baby and pregnancy more than anything in the world. I am so fortunate that in less than two weeks I will be holding my very own crying, breathing, blinking, wiggling baby in my arms (that will probably look like exactly like his daddy, lol). It has been one hell of a journey to get here, but soon it will all pay off :)

Sorry, a little late!

So when I said I would update Thursday after my ultrasound, I really meant "Saturday night after a day in the pool" oops! This ultrasound was probably my most uneventful ultrasound because Max was head down, face down just like he should be- which made it extremely difficult to see his face. My mom was able to go with me and we saw a glimpse but nothing too exciting. We did get to see the hair on his head and found out that he weighs 6 pounds 3 ounces! This means all of my pregnancy goals have been met: I knew I had to make it past 24 weeks, and I knew I wanted him over 5 pounds. And obviously I want him healthy. So far so good!! I absolutely cannot wait to hold this baby in my arms :)

35 weeks/NST

Since I have an ultrasound and will be updating again on Thursday I will make this pretty short. I went in today for another weekly Non Stress Test and OB appointment. Last week they told me to eat right before to increase fetal movement, so I took that as an opportunity to enjoy my all time favorite breakfast: a cinnamon crunch bagel with raspberry cream cheese from Panara Bread- yummm! The entire trip there Max was wiggling all around, and then I ate and I think he fell asleep because he did not want to move for anything. The first 15 mins of my NST Max moved one time, and since they like to see at least two movements with accelerated heart rates, they had to make Max move. The nurse did this by putting a little buzzer on my tummy, and WOW did Max jump! It was so funny and cute to see my whole tummy move, and it made him even that more real. There was one point when he wiggled away from the monitor and the nurse had to gently put her hand on it to pick up his heartbeat- just like Brody made the nurses at St V's do...it put a smile on my face to hear her talk about how he was ornery and wanted special attention, it brought back a lot of memories of my "Dennis the Menace" 20 months ago.
I then had my tummy check and all looked well. I did lose 5 pounds since last week...I think a lot of my swelling has gone down which helped attribute to this weight loss. My doctor says "just because hes scheduled for August 5th doesnt mean he knows that, he might want to come sooner." Lets just hope he waits till Jeremy gets home!

NST/ Change in Birthday

Going in to today's appointment I was very curious as to where I stood with my pregnancy. Within the last week, my feet and legs have swollen significantly, which can either be normal- or a sign of preeclampsia (this is one thing that annoys me about pregnancy- "normal" signs and bad signs are pretty much the same thing). My blood pressure was consistent today with what it has been this entire pregnancy, so it wasn't too much to worry about. I did end up gaining 10 pounds in the last week from becoming so swollen (one night last week I woke up and couldn't even bend my fingers they were so swollen). This is just something I am going to have to deal with, though, and as long as my blood pressure doesn't rise, Max and I are in good shape!

Today I also had my first weekly non stress test. Here they monitor the correlation between fetal movement and heart rate as well as contractions. First they establish a baseline fetal heart rate (Max's fell between 145-150 bpm) and then each time he moves his heart rate should increase about 15-20 bpm for at least 10-15 seconds. This shows that he is getting enough oxygen through the placenta. The nurse that monitored everything was so wonderful at explaining everything, but also told me she only shares the good information (because this is a NON stress test, not a stress causing test). She did say that everything looked good with Max, that everything looked exactly like it should. I was having consistent cramps (these look like mini contractions) that appeared on the monitor every few minutes and one contraction (this was in a 20 minute period). I couldn't feel the cramps, but could definitely feel the contraction. These have been coming approximately every 3 hours the past few days (but again this can be normal, I am in my last month).

While I was getting my NST, I was explained my due dates a little better. My initial due date was August 16 (according to my last period), my first ultrasound measured at August 18th, the next few ultrasound measured at August 15th, and the last few have measured at August 12th.
With my history and different factors in my pregnancy, my doctor advised that we move my c section up to the 5th of August. This means that Max's birthday will not be 8-9-10 like I had hoped it would be. I was pretty disappointed at first, but then my doctor said "once you have that baby in your arms, the date isn't even going to matter at that point." And I think this helped me put this all into perspective again. I have complete and utter faith that my doctor has my best interest and Max's best interest in mind when making decisions like this. With my most recent due date, I would have been delivering only 3 days before my due date, and with a history of placental abruption- my chances of having one again are 1 in 8. This is something I do NOT want to risk going through again, and moving up my c section might help prevent that. And while it would be cool to have a birthday of 8-9-10, I would much rather be holding a happy, healthy baby in my arms :) There is still the possibility that this date will change again depending on my ultrasound next Thursday or if I develop preeclampsia. Ultimately I am overjoyed that I will get to meet my son in a month or less!

Another week closer...

Today I went in for one of my 2 week appointments with my ob. Due to my recent ultrasounds my due date is now August 12...which means I scheduled my c-section for a mere 3 days before I should deliver. I am definitely cutting it close, which means I am somewhat expecting to deliver before the 9th. I am really ready for him to come anytime after the middle of July, though. A part of me thinks that the longer hes in there cooking, the better...and I have been waiting over a year and a half to hold my very own living, breathing child in my arms- what difference does a few weeks make? The other half of me worries about the chord wrapping around his neck, another placental abruption, or a car accident and if I could just get him here (after lungs are mature- of course) then I would know hes ok.

Ultimately I believe that any possibility of this little guy not making it was eliminated a long time ago. I truly believe I have an amazing doctor who thankfully caught my MTHFR and put me on the proper meds from the very beginning. While there is no proof that MTHFR and PPROM are linked, I believe completely that that is the reason I had problems with my pregnancy with Brody. Someday after I win the megamillions I will fund some sort of research on PPROM ;)

As far as future appointments go, heres the rundown: In two weeks I'll be back to my OB for another 2 week check and NST (Non stress test). From what I understand this is where I will be hooked up to 2 monitors to measure for contractions and the baby's heart rate for about 20 minutes. From there on out I will be in for weekly appointments and will also get the NST every week as well. I will also have one last ultrasound on July 15th to check amniotic fluid and development and make sure hes moving like he should be. I agree completely with my doc when he said today "hopefully we are doing all of this for nothing." We are getting close to the end, I cannot begin to thank all of you enough for all your support and encouragement through this entire process.

31 week ultrasound update

Since the high risk doctor found me at moderate risk for pre eclampsia a few months back, he has wanted me to go in monthy for ultrasounds to check blood flow and birth weight. Yesterday Jeremy and I went in to check out Max on the ultrasound- and it was simply amazing.
We arrived bright and early to MFM at Toledo Hospital, and when we got called back the tech asked us if we knew the sex. We told her we have known for quite some time that it was a boy, and within seconds she found his "pickle" and said "whoa! that is definitely a boy!" There was Max, legs spread, proudly showing off his business, and it was funny. We then saw his foot, and she was so amazed it was so big, and told us we were going to have one big baby boy by the size of his feet:) She then went on to check blood flow into the brain, and through the umbilical chord. Everything was pumping good, although the chord was very hard to get a read on because Max was wiggling so much. Next she took measurements of legs, arms, belly, and head to get a read on how much the little guy weighs. Up until this ultrasound I was pretty much a pro. After about 100 ultrasounds in the past 2 years, I have been able to tell what everything is they are looking at and checking for. But this was my first ultrasound seeing a baby bigger than 26 weeks old, and its crazy how many more questions I asked this time around. I am very interested, and I want to know everything they are looking at, checking for, and if there is something that doesn't seem quite right. The Toledo techs tell me everything- which I love....the tech's at St. V's never told me anything because only the doctor was allowed to talk to me. I then asked to see if they could get some 3d images of the little guy. He was in a pretty good position so she went for it. Wow these were amazing!! Toledo Hospital has some of the best machines around, and the images were so clear. It was so fascinating watching him move his little hand up and down and wiggle. I laid there with the biggest smile on my face, just so thankful for this little miracle (while also making "oooohs and aaaaahs like most do when watching fireworks).
So here are the stats: Max had a heartbeat of 156 bpm and weighed in at 3 pounds 15 ounces....so possibly by today hes 4 pounds! I was 31 weeks 2 days gestation going in and measured at 32 weeks exactly. This was so great to hear since the high risk doc thought he was going to struggle to keep up with his weight from the lack of blood flow. But all looks wonderful!!
As far as me and how I am feeling: I no longer have any back pain and I have been feeling pretty good! My only complaint now is that my feet hurt alll the time, and I think a huge factor for that is that I primarily wear flip flops which dont provide much comfort. Its not horrible, but a good excuse to stay seated :)

A Date has Been Set (probably)

So today I had my 2 week appointment with my doctor. My doctor said that I am getting to that point now where we can go ahead and schedule a c-section. He thought the 5th would be a good day, to which I replied "how about the 9th, I reeeeeally want the 9th." Of course he asked me the significance of this date, and I explained to him how I thought 8-9-10 for a birthday would be pretty sweet. He wasn't in surgery that day, but is going to get me in first thing that Monday morning at 8 am....and maybe even deliver at 8:09 am. Very cool!! On the other hand, he said he HIGHLY doubts that I will make it that far, that more than likely I will be delivering mid-July which is only 6 weeks away!! He says he feels completely comfortable with me delivering at 8 months, but as long as nothing is wrong we will stick it out until August 9th and keep little Max baking as long as possible. I am really fine with anything at this point. I just want a healthy little baby in my arms before the summer's end. My doc also wants my monthly ultrasounds done over at MFM at Toledo due to their amazing equiptment so I will be over there in a few weeks, and hopefully seeing a 3d scan of him. Jeremy is all about seeing his little boy via 3d ultrasound, so hopefully he will be around to check it out too!

26 weeks- a scare, ultrasound, and lots of love

For those who may have forgotten, I delivered Brody during my 26th week of pregnancy. Already this week has not been smooth sailing. I started off Monday convinced I was leaking fluid, so as soon as school ended I ran out with my mom to the doctor to make sure everything was ok. Thankfully I was just paranoid and my water was still in tact. My doctor was very understanding, and reassured me that I did the right thing by coming in. In my situation, he said it is always better to err on the side of caution.

Wednesday (today) I had to go in for my monthly ultrasound as ordered by the high risk doc to make sure there is not a slow in growth. I was very curious to go into this ultrasound to see what he looked like, where he weighed in compared to Brody....because he is one day younger than Brody when he was born. He had tons (but not too much) of amniotic fluid, heartbeat was 160 bpm, and he weighed in at a whopping 2 pounds 2 ounces! (Brody was 1 pound 11 ounces when he was born) The tech tried to do a 3-d ultrasound, but his legs were covering his face so it was pretty tough to see anything.

I think the toughest part of this week, though, is realizing that this is when I had Brody. I just know how attatched I am to this baby, and I have NO idea how I made it through losing Brody. Back when I was in high school, I always thought my mom was crazy for answering the phone with a panicked voice when I would call home late at night...she would tell me she always feared the worse, which I never understood. Now thats how I answer the phone when I see it's my doctor calling. I guess now I don't think shes so crazy.

Needless to say this baby is looking perfect, and everything is going along perfectly...and I am pretty darn proud of myself for making it to 26 weeks before my first major freak out.

I also wanted to do a little comparison with my pregnancies, because after tomorrow everything will be new to me...and I have been asked a lot about how my two little boys treated me during pregnancy so here it goes: I threw up with Brody, never with this baby-although the nausea was a killer at night. I had bleeding on and off with Brody, and no bleeding this time around. I had an anterior placenta with Brody, and this time my placenta is in the back- which only means that I can feel WAY more movement. I hated the smell of beer with Brody- it made me soooo nausious, and I have been craving a beer the past 6 months with this baby (I make anyone around me drinking one let me smell it). I craved twizzlers pull n peels with Brody, and this time I can't get enough jello. Both babies left me with horrible headaches, but this baby has left me with back pain like I have never experienced. In the hospital, Brody would kick the heart monitor away from the nurses, but this baby will barely move if someone puts a hand on my belly. I showed a lot sooner this time around....I am a lot bigger now than I was when I had Brody. Both boys have grabbed ahold of my heart and have make an impact in my life like no one else...

23 weeks

Today I had my highly anticipated ultrasound and consultation with my high risk doctor. Right away we did find out that this baby is certainly a boy! This was an extremely detailed ultrasound, lasting about an hour...my neck was very sore when it was over from turning my head to watch- but it was so worth it! My mom and I did eat before to get the little guy moving around, and I even walked on the wild side and had an ice tea with my meal! He was very wiggly, it was so cute. He measured 23weeks 0 days...which is exactly where he should be. Heartbeat was 146 bpm, lots of amniotic fluid, he has both kidneys, a bladder, and an amazingly adorable profile :). Everything on him is perfect!

So here is the down side: This hopefully will be no big deal, but there seems to be a decrease of blood flow from the placenta to the baby (im pretty sure thats what it is...i know it has to do with decreased blood flow) This puts me at MODERATE risk for pre-eclampsia or for the baby to slow down growth. So I am getting ultrasounds every 4 weeks from here on out to make sure hes measuring up to size (which he is now, woot woot), and then I am having some sort of stress test later on. So here are the negatives- IF I develop pre-eclampsia the ONLY solution is delivering the placenta, which means the baby will need to be delivered too. If you watch 19 kids and counting- this is why the mom had to deliver early. The good news is that baby asprin helps reduce my risk for this, and I have been on that since 9 weeks. Also, I am just at moderate risk, which means I might have problems but its not for certain...the high risk doctor isn't concerned enough to see me again, so I'll take it!!

20 Weeks!

Since I haven't updated in a while, I will try to catch you up on the past seven weeks. I thought I would also fill you in on why I am not getting an ultrasound this week- when almost everyone does when they are 20 weeks pregnant.

At my 16 week appointment, I had an ultrasound. The main reason my doctor ordered it was to check my cervical length. Some times when women pprom, it is due to an incompetent cervix (where you start dilating before you are supposed to). If I was dilating or funneling, my doctor would have to put in a temporary stitch (cerclage) to make sure everything stayed closed for as long as possible. Fortunately, my cervix was long and closed- exactly what I was hoping for.

It was also during this ultrasound that I informed the nurse that I already know we are having a boy- that I found out at 13 weeks. To which she replied that it is very difficult to determine the sex that early because everything is so swollen down there for either sex. She did say, "I can see where she got that from, though- but I wouldn't paint the room over it." So I guess we aren't positive the sex yet, but I would be REALLY shocked if I was told I am having a girl at the next ultrasound. My mom and I also found a striking resemblance between this baby's ultrasound pictures and Brody's ultrasound pictures (not counting fluid). I know it is just an ultrasound and those things are hard to see anyways, but wow they are extremely similar looking.

From 16 weeks to today I have been far more positive about this pregnancy. I was just so terrified that something would go wrong. I absolutely hated being pregnant because I was preparing for the worst news every day. Jeremy and I talked many times about how it was hard to even get attached in the beginning, because if something did go wrong- I had to be able to keep my distance for my own sanity. I didn't know if I would have to go through multiple miscarriages before bringing a baby to term- I didn't know if there was something wrong with me to prevent me from being able to carry a baby. Please don't get me wrong though- I have never for one second wished I wasn't pregnant or have taken it for granted. I have cherished each day like you couldn't believe. It was about two weeks ago when the weight was lifted off my shoulders. I felt the baby kick! He is so alive and real to me, and I am so relieved that I know he is ok on a daily basis. I don't have to wait until I get the doctor's to hear or see a heartbeat. I was also thrilled to have made it past 19 weeks without rupturing this time, and I will be ecstatic to make it to 24 weeks when the baby is viable and the chances of survival outside of the womb (considering there has been fluid the entire time) is so much higher. I don't think like your typical pregnant woman!

As far as my next ultrasound goes: My OB wanted an ultrasound and cervical check next week (21 weeks gestation), and my high risk doctor wanted an ultrasound in three weeks (23 weeks gestation). Two ultrasounds two weeks apart, costing me $160 each time seemed a little expensive considering not much changes during this time. My doctors agreed and typically made me stick with the latest one. So April 19th (I think) should be my next ultrasound and when we officially find out the sex.

It definitely wasn't an easy decision to make, though. A few nights ago I laid in bed wondering if I should be waiting that long before my next ultrasound. I kept thinking that what if something was wrong, I would want to know sooner rather than later (again- I don't think like a normal pregnant woman). Then all the sudden my tummy started thumping, it was so weird. I put my hand on my stomach and I could feel the baby moving and he had hiccups! (Many of you will think this is a neat story, and others will know what it REALLY means to me). I definitely started crying because he might not be able to reassure me and tell me hes ok- but his big brother can :)

13 week genetics screening

Yesterday I had my 13 week appointment at Toledo Hospital to get my first trimester screen done. During this appointment they checked for three things: 1. Make sure there is a bone in the baby's nose (via ultrasound) 2. Check the skin on the back of it's neck (via ultrasound) 3. Prick my finger and drop 5 drops of blood on a piece of paper (it's a little bit more technical than this, but you get it). Oh the amazing things they can do nowadays!
Due to the weather, Jeremy was off work and was able to make my appointment with me. So first we went back to get an ultrasound. The tech immediately commented on my long uterus "that you skinny girls have" (that was nice to hear) making her job more difficult. She was only joking, know that we loved this woman! It doesn't mean anything to me or the baby, just that I might not get as huge as other pregnant women. I also found out that I am "VERY fertile" from the looks of my ovaries (very good to know for future birth control methods). The baby must have been sleeping at first so the tech pushed on my belly a little bit with the wand, and wow that woke it up!! From there we saw the bone in it's nose, and skin on it's neck, all great signs. As the tech checked out more we saw the baby flip from back to tummy, lift its hands all around, and suck it's thumb. It was amazing to see how much bigger it got since I had seen it last. While we were watching I asked if she thought I would be able to find out the sex at my 16 week appointment. She said "probably depending on the type of ultrasound you have. Why, do you guys want to find out?" To which I replied "oh yes, I think it is going to be a boy, he thinks it will be a girl." And then, surprisingly she told us,"well I have to say I think it is going to be a boy because look here." and there she showed us the beginning of a little pickle :) We are having a boy again!! It is still very early to tell, but most likely that is what we will be having! A mother is always right ;). After the ultrasound I met with the MFM (high risk) doc and he said all looks good, and gave me some further restrictions in the pregnancy just to be safe. We then went on to meet with the genetics specialist to get my finger pricked and squeezed. So so far everything looks good for our baby boy :)

Feeling Better, Finally!

12 weeks in and I am doing great! I am getting my energy back and the nausea is subsiding, which is an amazing feeling. I had another doctor's appointment today with my ob, and my mom and I were able to hear the baby's heartbeat. It seemed like it took forever to find, but thankfully we heard the pitter-patter of a wonderful baby.

The doctor discussed with me that the high risk doctor believes that I will need to have a c-section for this pregnancy and all subsequent pregnancies due to the prematurity of my uterus and the location of my incision when I had Brody. This wasn't a huge upset to me, a part of me is disappointed that I will never get to deliver a baby the good old fashion way, but another part of me is relieved that I won't run the risk of another abruption. It seems like we are shooting for the first week in August for delivery. Once it gets closer to picking out an actual date, I will hopefully be persuading my doctor to deliver on the 9th (8-9-10...sweet huh?). Ultimately my doctor hopes that I make it that long. He says he will be relieved when I make it to 8 months. We will likely be bringing home a preemie, but not a baby that needs to be in the NICU. Not a big surprise.

So here is what to come: next week I meet back with the high risk doctor for an ultrasound and a first trimester screening (more blood tests!). In a month I meet back with my ob for another ultrasound and to check my cervix. Many women that pprom have an incompetent cervix, so they will check mine regularly to make sure it is good and closed! I will be 16 weeks at this point so there is the possibility that we will be able to find out the sex, yaaay! The nurse told me that it is very hard to tell at this point, but "sometimes you can see a little pickle." I will also be getting the quad screen blood test at this appointment. From there I will have another 20 week ultrasound (hopefully with plenty of fluid) at my ob's office and a 22 week ultrasound with the high risk doctor- and hopefully, if all goes smoothly, that is the last I will meet with him.

I am 12 weeks now, which is greatly reassuring, but somewhat terrifying. It was this week in my last pregnancy that I ended up in the ER due to massive bleeding. I will be very happy when this week is over :)

Adding On

One year after losing our precious son, we decided to try again. I remember my sitting down with my doctor for my post-partum check up, asking her when we could try again. Her response was "after three regular periods, you are free to start trying again." I remember sitting in the room thinking "three months, I have to wait three months?! 3 months, plus 9 months is one year (yeah I went to school for that) and I cannot wait a year until I have a child in my arms." And then later on my mom and I spoke and she told me to wait a year. HA! I couldn't imagine waiting three months, how could I wait a year?! Somehow we did, and in November we decided to start trying for our second child together.
Due to my mad math skills I knew we would probably find out if I was pregnant when we were on our honeymoon in Cancun the first week of December. I packed 5 pregnancy tests with me, because I knew I would not want to wait, and would probably start peeing on sticks before I could get an accurate result. As many of you know, my luggage arrived a few days late to Cancun. Ughhhh! I wanted to take a test so bad and couldn't, so Jeremy and I went to a drugstore where we tried to ask for a pregnancy test. It was very amusing watching Jeremy simulate having a baby bump and peeing on a stick! After she the lady tried to give us a pill that she described as "this make no baby" we eventually got a test. It was false :(. Eventually my luggage came, and every test I took was negative. What a bummer!! I guess getting pregnant would be harder than I thought. We got home, and my mom asks "so, are you pregnant?" Through the wonderful world of facebook she picked up on the subtle hints from my pprom sisters (who knew we were trying) and had to ask. It wasn't fun telling her no, but she had hope because she knew we were tyring. That night Jeremy and I went to get some groceries, and I picked up one last test "just in case." It was positive! After so many negatives this was such a surprise. It was such a surprise that Jeremy made me go out and get another test before telling anyone.
So my first task was to get a doctor. Someone who took my pregnancy very seriously, considered me high risk, and knew all about pprom. After a frustrating exploration and getting paired with a midwife, I switched practices. I am now going to an amazing doctor, the man that actually delivered me! My first appointment went great, my doctor ordered several extra tests for me and was very thorough. My mom and I got to see the baby via ultrasound and got a due date of August 18th.
About a week after my appointment I got a call from my doctor about my labs. He explained to me that I have a genetic defect called Methylenetetrahydrofolate reductase aka MTHFR. I am also homozygous which means that I inherited a gene from both of my parents. This basically means that my blood clots more easily and I do not process folic acid normally. If untreated, I have a high risk of miscarriage. I am now on baby aspirin to thin my blood and Folgard to get this baby the proper amount of folic acid. I also asked the doctor if this is why I pprom'd to which he replied "it could definitely be a reason why you had the abruption." Immediately after receiving this news I googled MTHFR. The first site I got to put me into a panic (pregnancy-info.net/mthfr). I wrote my pprom group and thankfully Dana put me at ease informing me that its no big deal when treated. phew!
A few weeks later I (along with my mom)met with one of the high risk doctors at Toledo. I got another ultrasound and was able to see the little one wiggling around, it was wonderful to see! It was amazing to see the difference in a matter of weeks. Then it was on to meet with the doctor. I was terrified. I was about to meet with the same doctor that told me the horrible news about Brody, and advised me to terminate. He was the bearer of my bad news and I had so much resentment built up against him. My appointment with him went well. He told me the chances of this being a successful pregnancy are "excellent." What a relief! He also believes that MTHFR is nothing to worry about, it didn't even seem to phase him. He also explained his rationale with advising termination. He knew Brody wasn't going to make it, and now I have a scar across my stomach when there never had to be one there. But then I look at Suki, a pprom sister's miracle: she pprom'd at 14 weeks and delivered at 27 (shortly after I had Brody).. I absolutely love looking at the pictures of this little girl. I would have always wondered "what if...." but now I don"t have to.
So far I am 11 weeks, and everything is looking great! I have had three calls from the doctors so far that go "We got your results back and everything looks great except..." but everything is always fixable! I am getting amazing care, and am so elated about this little one!!
Also, to all those that are asking me the sex of the baby: The sex of a baby is not determined until 16 weeks. Rarely will a doctor schedule and ultrasound to determine the sex, since it is not crucial to the baby's health. The high risk doc wants to do ultrasounds at 13 weeks and 22 weeks, so that means I probably wont find out until April, sorry! Believe me, we are very curious...I think it will be a boy, Jeremy thinks girl, and the high risk doc thinks girl because I am "beautiful." I really don't care though, as long as my baby gets here healthy :)